Thriving Through the Holidays with Chronic Illness: A Dietitian's Guide to Self-Care and Winter Nutrition

Hi Warriors,

As a registered dietitian living with lupus, I find myself constantly advising clients to prioritize their mental and physical health. Get adequate sleep. Eat nourishing foods. Learn to say no before exhaustion takes over. Love yourself with the same care you give others.

I talk the talk but didn't always walk the walk — even though I know, both intellectually and physically, that self-care is critical. When I've let myself push too hard in the past, my lupus symptoms demanded my attention at the least convenient time: fatigue, joint pain, muscle aches, stiffness, rashes, brain fog. For you, it might be fevers, digestive upset, chest pain, or something entirely different. Throughout my younger years, I became VERY good at ignoring these warnings, boxing them up and pushing them away. Sometimes I could muscle through; other times I crashed.

And I was tired of crashing. When I changed my diet and lifestyle to better support my healing, I finally began to be able to have more energy, more wiggle room, less symptoms!

This holiday season, I wanted to help my clients do better as well.

What does living with lupus have to teach me about self-care? It teaches all of us that having great health looks like putting daily deposits into your "battery". What do I mean by that? When you eat a healthy breakfast, you're adding in more battery power, when you get a good night's sleep, you've added more battery, when you go on a walk or move your body in a way that bring you joy, you add more to your battery. Most importantly, keeping up with these habits and more, you begin to build a bigger and bigger battery. You deserve the same care and love and kindness you devote to others, and if you treat yourself well, you can build up that battery pack and resiliency, build up your energy and ability to live again!

These lessons apply to everyone, chronic illness or not, so I'll share them here — along with some practical nutrition strategies for winter.

The First Steps: Listen and Observe

When my lupus flared in the past, it was sending a clear message: I'm tired, overextended, stressed. I need rest. I didn't always listen immediately, but eventually I'm forced to, and when I do, I feel better.

All of us benefit from slowing down and tuning into our physical selves. What sensations are you experiencing, and what do they reveal about your emotional state? We should heed our thoughts, yes, but tuning into our bodies goes deeper — uncovering feelings we might hide, truths we don't want to acknowledge. Without chronic illness, the messages might be subtler: a vague chest tightness, a quick catch in your breath, a barely noticeable hand tremor. But they exist, signaling stress.

The science is clear: while the body's stress response can be lifesaving in true emergencies when "fight or flight" is essential, chronic stress becomes toxic. Stress triggers our sympathetic nervous system into overdrive, releasing cortisol and inflammatory molecules that, in excess, fuel disease. Conversely, pausing to notice and interrupting this negative cycle is profoundly beneficial. It can be as simple as breathing deeply and counting to ten. Our bodies know what's happening and signal when we need care. We must pay attention.

You Are Not Responsible for Everyone and Everything

The holidays — essentially mid-November through year's end — become a stress test we create for ourselves. Land mines lurk everywhere: more food, more alcohol, more family dynamics, more unfamiliar (or overly familiar) surroundings.

With my overinflated sense of responsibility, I took on so much every holiday season. I used to believe it was my job to ensure everyone has a positive experience. For better or worse, I notice and feel every personal and interpersonal dynamic in a room. I sense and absorb even the most subtle discomfort, frustration, anger, and shame, alongside upbeat emotions. Importantly, I used to feel compelled to step in and fix things, to prop everyone up. It was exhausting. And most importantly, it was NOT my job.

But lupus reminds me how absurd — even egotistical — this is. In truth, I can't possibly care for everyone. Neither can you. And neither should you. People are adults, and can figure it out on their own!

Checking our automatic thoughts helps. Question those anxieties and urges to fix everything. Things can be messy, two people can get into a slightly awkward conversation, you don't need 8 desserts! Allow yourself to live in the moment, there is beauty in the imperfect.

It's Okay to Ask for What You Need

To take full responsibility for my wellbeing, I must speak honestly and act with integrity. This means asking for what I need — clearly, without apology. Historically, I've been terrible at this personally, burying my needs while taking care of everyone else's, even rejecting clear offers of help. "I'm good, I've got it," I'd say, while simultaneously feeling bitter and resentful about doing everything myself. This lack of clarity isn't fair to anyone. Lupus reminds me I need to do better.

I've learned when hosting, when guests asked what they could bring, actually take them up on it! I gave specific ideas instead of insisting I had everything covered. My guests appreciated a clear answer and the events came together beautifully. You don't have to do everything yourself! So many of my clients are hyper-independent and capable people, just because we CAN do it, doesn't mean we should.

Winter Nutrition to Support Your Body Through the Holidays

Beyond emotional self-care, let's talk about the seasonal anti-inflammatory foods that can help you feel your best:

Leafy Greens (Kale, Collards, Swiss Chard): Kale earns its superfood status with high levels of Vitamin K, Vitamin E, and magnesium. Vitamin K supports blood clotting and bone health. Vitamin E protects the brain from oxidative stress while magnesium improves brain plasticity, enhancing learning and memory while reducing anxiety and depression. Try this: massage chopped kale with olive oil to reduce bitterness. All leafy greens in this family — collards, turnip greens, spinach, mustard greens, cabbages — offer similar benefits.

Important note for lupus warriors with antiphospholipid syndrome: Exercise caution with dramatically increasing Vitamin K intake, as it affects blood clotting and can interfere with Coumadin or Warfarin. If you're interested in eating more greens (collards, turnip greens, kale, spinach, and cooked broccoli are highest in Vitamin K), discuss more frequent INR checks with your doctor to ensure you remain in therapeutic range.

Beets: These vibrant root vegetables shine with potassium, magnesium, iron, and folate. One cup of cooked beets provides 34% of your daily folate and 14% of daily potassium. They're also excellent sources of lycopene and anthocyanins — antioxidants that reduce inflammation. Beets are particularly high in nitrates that lower blood pressure by relaxing and widening blood vessels. Studies show beetroot juice significantly lowers both systolic and diastolic blood pressure. This matters especially for lupus warriors: people with SLE have 2.7 times the risk of dying from cardiovascular disease compared to the general population.

Sweet Potatoes: A wonderful source of Vitamin A, fiber, and Vitamin C, supporting immunity and eye health. Mash, roast, or add to hearty vegetable soups for cold weather comfort.

Lemons: A fantastic Vitamin C source that brightens so many foods with tartness. Vitamin C supports immunity, wound healing, and iron absorption. Sprinkle lemon juice on roasted vegetables, or because Vitamin C helps absorb iron from animal proteins, add to meat or poultry before or after cooking.

Grapefruit: Delicious, rich in Vitamin C, and very low in sugar — but can interfere with many medications. Always check prescription labels before enjoying. I love peeling into small segments and eating plain or adding to salads.

Why Seasonal Matters: Eating seasonal fruits and vegetables means produce that's higher in vitamins, minerals, and phytochemicals. In-season produce is generally less expensive and healthier — a double win! Besides helping digestion, immunity, and reducing inflammation, these foods are delicious. Triple win!

My Progress (Imperfect but Real)

I have learned so much in my 26 years of living with autoimmune diseases, and as my body and life changes, I'm still learning how much I can do! And learning to say no to things I don't want to do!

This holiday season, I invite you to join me in being kinder to yourself. Listen to your body. Ask for help. Nourish yourself with foods that reduce inflammation. Set boundaries. Take that nap.

You deserve it.

Need more personalized support? Reach out to me directly via email, or schedule a complimentary 15-minute meet and greet call: https://p.bttr.to/3KI5ZVd